kuwait part 3;)

i reached sara's house..
tired from the flight.

its alwys the short flights that get to me..
i dont mind the longer ones..shorter ones gives me a constant headache!

sara: i want details about the GUY now..everything spill..
so i re-cap the whole story starting from bahrain airport..sara kept shouting at the exciting part..
lool..i know she was happy for me;p
i was deciding whether or not i should msg him...
i decided to take a nap and msg him later...sara agreed on this plan as well..

i took a nap..while sara was opening my suitcase looking for possible outfits for our dinner today..in kuwait everyone dresses up..
as if they stepped out of vouge..
so not like bahrain...in bahrain ppl r really simple..when compared to kuwaiti's fashion..which I LOVEEE..

After one hour n a half..i wake up..
feeling refreshed,,,
a nap was just wat i needed...
i wake up and reach for my bahraini no.
hes on my mind..i send a msg..saying: hi..
after hitting the sent button i realize that i didnt even put my name..how stupid!
immedietly my fone rings..its HIM....Ahmed the keeper;)

Me: aloo
Ahmed: 7mdila 3ala salamtich;p did u just reach home?
i laugh: no i took a nap thats why..
Ahmed: noum el3wafii sweetie...
me: how did u know it was me..
Ahmed: honestly i was waiting for u..im glad u msged..i actually thought u changed ur mind or something..
(supper cute..i didnt know guys worry like us;p i keep thinking they dont care..)
me: la eshd3waaaa Ahmed.
Ahmed: so tell me shno ur plans for the night
me: athen bnroo7 slider station bs...i love their food..
Ahmed: ok slider it is..
me: what does that mean hehehe
Ahmed: i wana see u..so i guess im going to be there as well..
me( blushing): mm..ok..i guess..
Ahmed: see you soon and talk to u later sweetie pie..
( SWEETIE PIE..ohlalalalalallalalaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa..i love him already;p )

i tell sara about this and she gets more excited..she thinks i should dress up..
so i wear a cute short white eyelet dress..
and put on red lipgloss..
and tie my hair in a ponytail..and wear my fav tod slippers..

sara gives me the heads up for my outfuit and we go to slider..at around 8ish..

as soon as we walk in..
i see Him..
not my keeper..

but it was a blast from the past..

what the hell..

Mohd was sitting with Ahmed the keeper...

Ahmed smiles and waves..

i wave back

and Mohd looks at us both suprised.

and goes in deep discussion with Ahmed..

to be continued.....


(fyi:mohd, my Kuwaiti ex from uni)

k-u-w-a-i-t part 2

his name was ahmed ha..
love that name...
i smiled..
i just said: nice to meet you..im yara..

he looked suprised..
and he said: i love that name..(LOL)

i didnt know what to say..for some reason..cat got my tounge at that moment..but ahmed continued.." so where are you heading to ya yara..

me: kuwait on jazeera
he laughed: hahahha no way.. me too..
i was happy..i never get this lucky
a cute guy talking to me randomly in the aiport
we are heading to the same destination
he was normal..from what i can tell so far
and we were on the same flight..what more can i ask for..

then we heard a loud voice: FINAL CALL JAZEERA AIRWAYS..FINAL CALL..
we both looked at each other and laughed since we were lost in conversation..

and he said: would you mind if i sit next to u in the flight?
me( JUMPING UP AND DOWN TO MYSELF): trying to act cool...yeah sure..id like that..

we were walking to the terminal.
and we were going inside the plane..
we were both seated in diff places..
however..my cute abercrombie guy told the stewrdess: Darling she's with me..can you manage us two seats?
the stewrdess melted..i mean he's cute..dimples when he smiled..
ofcourse she said: ofcourse sir i will look for a place..

we were seated next to one another in less then 5 min
our plane wasnt so full..which was a good thing..


we talked all the way to kuwait..
what i leared abt ahmed:
1. he graduated from the states..
2. hes 28...PERFEct age
3. he visits bahrain for work
4.he has one older sis and one older brother..making him the baby of the family

he was so sweet..
is he just a player trying to get some action since im going there for the weekend..thinking to myself..

As if ahmed read my mind..

listen Yara i dont usually do this..i hope u understand..seriously i dont know why i did..i was drawn to you...
i didnt want to regret not doing anything..
im forward and i know what i want..

me(thinking straight for once when it comes to guys): u seem nice..and i do want to get to know you more..
friends?

ahmed smiled : friends.

that eased up everything for me..knowing that this is just a friendship and not a meanigless fling for him..
he was geunine..he really wanted to get to know me..

we exchanged numbers..
and we said we might do coffee in kuwait....


He waited with me till my friend picked me up...
I saw a girl walking from afar.
i looked at him..
thats my friend...i better go..

AHmed: it was really nice meeting you..best flight ever;)
HOW SUPER CUTE IS THAT!!!

me: thanks for waiting..

ahmed: anytime..

msg me when your home safe..


hmm..doesnt that sound to much of a boyfriend...

i walk towards my friend
she gives me a hug for like 5 min
and then asks..who's the hottie ur talkng to!!! details..asap...
( fyi: my friend's name is sarah)

i tell my friend his name..
her jaw drops..
and she says..wooow..btw..hes an eligiable bachelor..thgeeeeeeeeeel.ma y36eh elbnat wayh...kila work work..
shnoo swaitelaaayyy tell me...
hehhehehehhe

since kuwait is a small world like bahrain and every1 knows each other..\i was happy with the feedback i got..
i felt it..

ahmed seemed like a keeper...(crossing my fingers and wishing that was true)

until next time.

xxxx

K-U-W-A-I-T

i was heading to Bahrain International Airport.

my sister dropped me..

i was dressed down in my Juicys..i picked an electric blue..to uplift my mood..

i had my aviators on..and my hair was in full motion- very goldylocks..except it was light brown;p

i tried to cheer myself up..

going in the duty free i noticed a cutie checking me out..

he was really tall..

and wearing sweatpants..abercrombie..

hmm...nice...

he was dressed in a fit grey shirt and navy sweatpants..

as if he stepped out of a magazine..

really..

he was cute

he caught me checking him out as well.

and smiled..

usually i would look away and act all serious and aloof..

however since this was a weekend of fun.

i decided to LIVE A little..

i smiled..

heheh

and he smiled even wider..

i walked away...looking at what to get..

the usual makeup stuff..

then suddenly i heard a manly cough

i looked around..

and found my abercrombie guy waiting for me...

all he said was : Hi

i smiled..

i didnt even feel shy for some reason..

i was like : Hi

he was a little bit embaressed and he said: im really sorry i dont usually say hi to random girls in airports..( i laughed)

he eased up..

and continued: so,,mm..my name is ahmed


to be continued..

post- wedding blues

so ive been feeling sorry for myself..
looking at old pics..
talking to our mutal friends about it..

i was sad..
the day of the wedding..
i was msging my friend who was there..

hmm...he didnt invite me
my friends thought it was rude but seriosuly i cant go to his wedding and watch him with someone else..
i was in a state of being heartbroken..
i wasnt in the mood to go out or see anyone..
i wanted to be by myself.

i realized a lot of things about myself..
1. i shouldnt give myself a hard time for what i did when i was younger
2. i should let go and embrace life
3. i shouldnt live in the past (i.e listen to sad music and look at old pics and memories of us)
4. i should suuround myself with positive and energetic ppl and not friends who put me down,.


with this frame of mind, i decided to let go of this depression..
i will find a guy who will love me even more than fahad
and will not let me go..

so i decided what any girl does to cheer herself up.
i packed my bags and visited my best friend from college in kuwait,,,
WEEEEKEEEND TRIP...

help me

I cant sleep..im in bed..trying to stop thinking of u..i really want to call u..im so close to doing it..im thinking bk and forth..call him..or not..call him or not..call him or not.. Im scared it backfires on me.imagine he's rude..he mite be a diff fahad from what i know.can i handle that..we havent talked for a very long time..can i handle it or will it make things even harder.. U knw im thinking to pass by ur wedding just from the outside..i know..im so pathetic..i want to see u on ur wedding day..will u b happy?? Dear readers pls help me out in my tough situation,,im lost,confused,hurt and heartbroken..i am in need of a guy's advice!!! Im falling apart......

three days..

three days left...

im thinking of you
still thinking of you all the time

my friends tell me to get over it
its been so long
and how come im still hung up on u
they dont understand how much i love u
i have never in my life felt this way about anyone
they have never felt this way
or they would have understood what im feeling

i look at my fone all the time
every call i think its you
and my heart sinks a little everytime its not you

i go out
and i think il see u with her
i want to see u with her
i want to see what u will do
will u act like u dont know me
or will u look at me with those big eyes of yours and tell me you love me with them

i can read your eyes
thats how well i know you
and how well you know me
we dont need to talk
we dont need to say anything
we understand each other on a different level..
if i see u
atleast i can know what ur thinking about
i really want to see u

i go out
looking for u
searching for u
where are you Fahad..

at home.i listen to our songs..
i close my eyes
to take me back to the time
i was urs
and you were mine
my head is somewhere else these days
i daydream all the time
wishing it was real..

i want to feel your touch
i want to feel your kiss
i want to touch your face..
i really do..

i go back in time with our memories..

remember when we were walking by the beach at night
and your holding my hand not letting go of me
and we kissed
that perfect kiss
no one was there but us
it seemed like out of a book..
we sat on the sand
you were facing me just looking at me.
telling me how much u loved me..your eyes..so honest..so inviting..
we talked about our future
i could touch my dream..
it all went away in a flash..

everything reminds me of u
i know this is such a cliche to say
but its true..
songs remind me of u
my room reminds me of u
" it was 2000, around 11 or so...first time we talked on the fone for hours and hours and we had skool the next day..
remember fahad?
our first fone call..
i was so happy..

i go back to the time of our graduation as well..
when you kissed me
in that hidden corrider
hoping that no one will see us..
remember that fahad?

i dont want to let you go
what can i do?
im lost and confused..
you broke me
i cant be with anyone else
its not fair..
have u cursed me
i am unable to love after u
thats not normal..
its been years
i just cant seem to take that step..
i cant let you go
i dont want to love anyone but you
i dont want to go out with anyone but you
i dont want to kiss anyone but you

remember our first date fahad
i blush everytime i think of it

i cry everyday at night
no one knows how much i really love you but me
i dont think you even know how much i really care
cuz if u do
trust me you will be with me

i want to hear your voice..
i wish i can call you
but im so scared of your reaction
i know you'll act all tough and be cold with me
i cant handle that right now..
its not fair..

if i can go back in time
i wont do that mistake..i will take good care of u..
i hate the way i think
im not supposed to think like that but i do..its not healthy
im really scared

if you do go ahead with your wedding
should i just give up..

you know what your cousin told me the other day
she was like he might get a divorce u never know and he will end up with you in the end after all
the way its supposed to be
imagine even ur cuzn thinks like that..
she knows we are meant to be..
i cant wait for that what if
i cant stop everything
ive done tht for years
and you have not acknowledged it
you have ignored me
i deserve it
for what i did
but not to this extent..
should i let u go after u go ahead with this marriage..
should i give up on u and forget u

i wish i can do that
then i wouldnt be a mess..

I LOVE U FAHAD..
walah

my heart is killing me
literally, i can feel it break..
i thought ppl exagerate when they talk about heartaches and stuff
but its true
its all true

i know that when u go to bed
u think of me
looking at ur fone
thinking if u shud call or not
then u decide not to..
i know u so well..

if i see u
u mite break..
i want u to break and call me
and give in to me
ur strong without me
but when u see me
u crumble...i see it..
and u see it.

i just need to see u..i really do..

WEDDING COUNTDOWN!!

the wedding is in 4 days..
how can u say u love me when u picked her
how can u fall apart when u see me
but pick her
how can u long for me
but pick her..

it doesnt make sense..
ur initails are engraved in my class ring..
i cant wear that ring anymore..

your not mine..i hope that something happens in the next four days and u wake up
and come bk to me and to ur senses..

isnt that funny that i still have hope..
im pathetic
or is it because im that in love with you that i cant see the truth

You picked someone else
even though it was arranged
you shouldnt have gone thru with it

your so stubborn Fahad..
so stubborn
you would rather live your life with someone you dont love now..why would you do that..
stop being arrogant..
i know you too well..
get over it fahad..
admit it to urself
you love me
i know you do

u have these walls around ur heart
not wanting to get hurt
not wanting to let anyone in

u think what ur doing will make u happy
i will make u happy

god fahad..dont do this..

i look at our pictures..again..and again..
i love that pic of u with my A/X hat..baby blue looks so good on u..
i feel like ur looking at me when i look at that pic..
isnt that weird..
im losing it..
hmm...

fahad..i spray your scent in the pillow next to me..
i feel as if ur next to me..
remember the last time u were next to me ..
telling me how much u loved me
i close my eyes and go back to that day
u next to me in bed
whispering in my ear
how much u love me..
and how much u missed me..
and u actually cried from missing me so much..

i miss u
i miss the nice u
i miss the loving u
i miss the old u

please break down the walls
please come back to me

i made a mistake
im human..
why dont u forgive me and come back

your cousin called the other day..
i couldnt help it but ask about u
he told me how u think its weird that ur going out with ur so called "Wife" and its not me..
and how u have ur doubts..

im doubting the way u felt about me
dont ppl who love forgive?
isnt that whats loving someone all about..

was i really the one??